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I don’t like being told what to do. My guess is that you’re not too fond of it either. So, if I’m engaged in an unhealthy behavior and someone lectures me about it, I may not take what they’re saying to heart. If, however, a well meaning friend poses some questions for me to consider, I’m a lot more likely to react positively. Questions enable me to think through the issues at hand and make a decision for myself. They remind me—or can, if the the right questions are asked from a place of love‚—not only that I’m in control, but also that I’m responsible for the good and the bad choices that I make.

So in this post I’d like to do just that. No lecture, only questions. My suggestion would be that you not read the following questions like a typical blog. Put your phone on silent, wait till you won’t be interrupted and read and answer the questions below slowly and deliberately.

1. What do you like about viewing pornography?

2. What do you not like about viewing pornography?

3. What makes you think you need to change?

4. What will happen if you don’t change?

5. What would be the good things about changing your pornography behavior (list as many as possible)?

6. What would your life be like three years from now if you changed your pornography behavior?

7. Why do you think others are concerned about your pornography behavior?

8. Suppose you don’t change, what is the WORST thing that might happen?

9. What is the BEST thing you could imagine that could result from changing?

10. If you were to decide to change, what would you have to do to make this happen?

If you have been struggling with pornography for a long time and are ready to get serious about recovery, I recommend that you read our article by Fr. Sean Kilcawley, Finding a Good Therapist. In it you will find websites that allow you to punch in your zip code to find a therapist near you and jumpstart your own road towards recovery.