People often ask me for a broad overview of the recovery process. I view recovery as a three tiered process: Sobriety, Inner Healing, and Transformation.
Being sober means no longer using the substance to which you were addicted—pornography. Many people rate their success by the number of days, weeks, months or years of sobriety. Your sobriety date is the last day you acted out. Having a long period of sobriety can be a great encouragement to anyone in recovery. The first goal of recovery is to establish a solid period of sobriety. This can take one to three months. This encompasses points one, two and three of the Integrity Restored Recovery Program: Self-knowledge and Commitment, Purifying Your Life, and Support and Accountability.
This pertains to identifying and resolving the root causes of an addiction.You will learn there are many painful emotional issues that can lead a person to self-medicate with pornography.
They are often the result of childhood traumas. Unless these issues are identified and resolved, sobriety tends to be “white-knuckle.” Thus, a person can be sober but not in recovery. By identifying and resolving the root causes of the addiction, sustained sobriety is much easier. Inner healing also includes restoring relationships that have been damaged due to the addiction. These include marriage and families. For most married men, marital therapy is needed to heal the betrayal trauma caused by their use of pornography.
This encompasses points three, four and five: Support and Accountability, Counseling, and a Spiritual Plan.
This is the ultimate goal of your program. While God wants to help you with your sobriety and recovery, his ultimate goal is to transform you into a new creation. He wants to heal you and help you become the person you were created to be. This is what makes recovery and life exciting for most addicts. They are able to see God actively working in their lives and are more easily able to discern His will. They are able to claim their true identity as children of God. Marriages are healed and relationships are restored. Many men and women are even grateful that their worlds came crashing down because of their addiction. They realized their lives and relationships were never healthy to begin with. Now they have the opportunity create healthier lives and relationships. This encompasses points five, six and seven: a Spiritual Plan, Education, and Virtue.
By understanding the three tiers of recovery and working all seven points of the recovery program, a person can overcome his addiction, restore relationships, and become the person God created him to be!