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Understanding a Wife’s Pain

1Aug

About the Author

Dr. Peter Kleponis

Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D., SATP-C is a Licensed Clinical Therapist and Assistant Director of Comprehensive Counseling Services in Conshohocken, PA. He holds an M.A. in Clinical-Counseling Psychology and a Ph.D. in General Psychology. Dr. Kleponis has over 18 years of professional experience working with individuals, couples, families and organizations. He specializes in marriage & family therapy, pastoral counseling, and pornography/sexual addiction recovery. He is Certified in the Diagnosisand Treatment of Sexual Addictions by The American Association of Christian Counselors' Light University, by Dr. Mark Laaser's Freedom Begins Here Program, and by Dr. Todd Bowman’s SATP program. Dr. Kleponis has been a guest on several EWTN television programs including Women of Grace, Franciscan University Presents, Crossing the Goal, EWTN Bookmark, and At Home with Jim & Joy. He is also a regular guest on Relevant Radio's On-Call program. Dr. Kleponis travels throughout the country educating people on how to win the battle against pornography through his Fighting Porn in Our Culture…and Winning! program. He is the author of two books, The Pornography Epidemic: A Catholic Approach (2012) and Integrity Restored: Helping Catholic Families Win the Battle Against Pornography (2014). Dr. Kleponis is also founder of the Integrity Starts Here Catholic recovery program for pornography and sexual addiction. He works with individuals and couples from around the United States and internationally in-person, by phone, and by Skype. For more information see his website, www.peterkleponis.com.

Comments (2)

Dawn Wilson - January 1, 2023 5:46 pm

My fiance and I have been together for a year and a half.
He is 57 and I am 65.
After just four weeks together I accidentally saw on his phone that he was going to hook up sites.
He also lost interest in having sex with me at the exact time.
We have only had sex 6 time’s in that year and a half.
No affection either.
When I confronted him about the sex sites he off handedly said it was just entertainment out of boredom.
That the sites and people aren’t real.
If he had been taking care of our sexual relationship it may have been easier to accept and not be hurt by it.
But he knew from the get go that I had been cheated on in all three of my long term relationships.
He has continued to go to these hook up sites through out the entire year and a half.
Saying sexual things to other women that I would give anything for him to say to me….
Even giving some of the women his email and phone number.
He has insisted the whole time that he is very sexually attracted to me.
Yet he hasn’t even kissed me like a lover for six months now.
It has damaged me in so many ways…..
Now I’m not sure how or if I can ever heal enough to believe that he would be making love to me because he truly Desires me, or if it will now always feel like he is doing it because he has to.
I have tried to explain to him through out our relationship how deeply this has hurt me.
But he usually gets angry and acts as if I shouldn’t be upset at all.
I feel that if it is indeed true that these sites are simply entertainment and the women aren’t even real…..why would he choose them over me.
Are they worth the Pain that he knows he is causing me??
We have been homeless for a year and he has said all along that the stress of that is why he couldn’t be intimate.
But obviously he is still able to feel sexual in order to go to these sites and flirt with others.
He just doesn’t feel that towards me.
Help!!!!

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