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Chuck was doing well in his recovery. He had four months of healthy sobriety; however, he complained of being bored with life. Not much interested him.

He went to school and work everyday but found little enjoyment in it. He believed he might be depressed but didn’t know why. He thought that giving up porn would improve his life but saw little evidence of this.

What was happening to him?

What’s Happening on the Inside

When a person gives up porn, there are several internal changes that occur. First, there is a detox process. The brain has become accustomed, and even dependent on, operating at an extremely high level of neurochemical stimulation. In recovery the brain has to overcome its dependence on this high level of stimulation and get accustomed to operating at a normal level once again.  This can take several months.

During the detox process it’s not uncommon to experience some withdrawal symptoms. These can include depression, anxiety, insomnia, lethargy, difficulty with concentration, and even headaches and stomachaches. As uncomfortable as these symptoms may be, they are temporary. For those who persevere in recovery these symptoms will end and they can experience freedom from the compulsion to use pornography.

The key to success is to not struggle through this process alone. You need to have a team of people available to help you through it. This team includes accountability partners, support groups, sponsors therapists, clergy, and caring family and friends. You’d be surprised at who is eager to help you!

Looking for Excitement

Another challenge for the brain is getting used to normal everyday life again. The brain is always looking for new stimulation. This is why we often enjoy learning new things. It is also attracted to that which is novel. This is why we are attracted to watching certain “train wrecks” in life.

As gruesome as they may be, we can’t stop looking at them. Examples of these “train wrecks” include scandals among Hollywood celebrities, politicians, and professional athletes. Bruce Jenner is one public figure that comes to mind.

One of the problems with pornography is that it over-stimulates the brain. As stated above, the brain becomes accustomed to this extreme stimulation. When a person stops using porn, regular everyday activities, which used to be interesting, are now considered extremely boring. The brain is craving the hyper-stimulation it used to enjoy.

This is why Chuck could not find satisfaction in daily activities. Similar to the symptoms of the detox process, as the brain gets back to a normal level of neurochemical functioning, everyday activities will once again be interesting and enjoyable. You simply need to persevere in your recovery and with a good system of support and accountability.

Easing the Way

Going through this process need not be an unbearable struggle. There are things you can do to make it easier. First, as stated above, you need to have a strong system of support and accountability. This is needed for any successful recovery.  No one can succeed in recovery alone, nor should anyone have to endure recovery alone. The recovery process can actually be a time of incredible growth and creativity!

Here are some suggestions:

1. Get out and be with people. Take this time to renew old relationships and develop some new ones. Most people who have become addicted to pornography will admit it has stolen much time away from important relationships. Now is the time to get back into life with healthy relationships.

2. Rekindle old passions and develop new ones. We all have healthy interests we’re passionate about. They could be hobbies, goals, causes, etc.  Now is a great time to dive into them.  Whether it’s golf, cars, food, education, pro-life, or your Catholic faith your passions can be a great source of enjoyment and fulfillment in your life.

Everyone has certain passions in their life.  If you can’t think of any for your self, simply answer this question: Name one thing you could talk about all day long and not get tired? Whatever your answer to that question is, that is your passion.  If it’s healthy, feed that passion!

3. Rekindle your appreciation for true beauty. The problem with pornography is that it warps our view of beauty, and not just in women but also in the world around us. It leads us to only see beauty in the surgically and digitally enhanced images on a computer screen.

To recover from this, I recommend getting out into the world and developing a healthy appreciation for beauty.  Go to an art museum, listen to an orchestra, visit a public garden, read poetry. Get to appreciate all the beauty that God has created in the world.

In your relationships with women, learn to appreciate true beauty that is not based only on the physical, but also on character, personality, gifts, and talents, etc.

As you work through the detox process and you enrich your life with healthy relationships, passions and an appreciation for true beauty, you will find life once again enjoyable. While it may never be as exciting as viewing porn, it will definitely be more fulfilling!